Finding Forever Read online

  “What plans do you have?”

  She hadn’t expected him to call her on her statement. There wasn’t a heck of a lot to do in a place she was just a guest in.

  “I don’t need to describe my day to you, Liam.”

  “Maybe I’m interested in it, Whitney. Interested in you.”

  “Have you ever thought that I simply don’t enjoy your company?”

  He didn’t even blink at her rude remark. This man seemed impossible to put off. That was a first. Most men in her experience went running for the hills when they knew you had no desire to go to bed with them.

  Of course it was only her words that told him that. Her body spoke an entirely different language. But if you added on the fact that neither of them trusted the other’s motives, the two of them made for a truly volatile combination.

  “I think you’re not used to having a man be so assertive, so … cocky,” he said with a grin. “But you should get used to it. You’re attractive and so much more.”

  “Oh, please,” she said with a roll of her eyes. “Is that line supposed to impress me? Should I tremble inside because you find me suitable? And why don’t you please expand on ‘so much more’? Could you be more precise?”

  He looked confused for a moment as if no woman had ever challenged him when he was paying a compliment, but quickly his arrogant smile popped back into place.

  “Take a walk with me and I’ll tell you everything about you that I deem irresistible.”

  “Well, it shouldn’t be too long a list, since you don’t know me,” she told him.

  Unbelievably, though, she found her arm in his as the two of them began walking down the hallway and toward a back door. They only paused long enough to collect heavy jackets, and then they were moving along the snow-covered path around the mansion.

  “I did my research on you before I showed up in Oregon on your doorstep,” he said.

  “I’m not surprised by that. I’m sure you wanted to find out if your brother’s orphaned children were being taken care of properly. Plus, you would have had to do some kind of research to figure out where I lived.” What worried her was that they might have found her lacking in parental abilities. She needed to address this issue with Liam and Frederick, but she was afraid to do it, afraid of what they might have to say. “And of course,” she added, “you were driven by the shock of learning of Vincent’s death.”

  “Yes, it was quite a shock. I don’t know why I let so much time pass after my brother left. We had been so close when we were younger, but our lives got busy with school and then work. We weren’t the healthiest emotionally when he walked away from here, and I felt that he’d betrayed not only our family but me personally. Now, though, it all seems so petty — so ridiculous.”

  “I am sorry about your loss, and I know it must be hard. My sister and I talked nearly every day, at least on the phone, and if we didn’t see each other at least twice a week, it was only because some sort of disaster had occurred to keep us apart. She was more than a sibling — she was almost a second mother, and later my best friend. There are days I can’t even breathe, I miss her so much. Raising the children in her home is rough because of all the memories the place holds, but I didn’t want them to go through too many changes. But each day I’m there, I feel as if she should walk through the front door with a huge smile on her face and some bag in her hand filled with groceries or something for the kids. She and her husband were both incredible parents.”

  Whitney’s eyes filled with tears as she thought about her lost sister. Even after a year, the ache hadn’t gone away, and she hadn’t expected it to. Sometimes it was less of a burden, but it was always there.

  “I think what pains me the most about my brother’s death,” Liam said,” is that we had become so disconnected. I often thought about him through the years, but my stubbornness and anger over what had happened prevented me from looking for him. Since learning he’s gone … that we won’t have a chance to make it better, I’ve felt as if there’s a wound that just won’t heal.”

  Oddly enough, she found herself sympathizing with this man. But who was she to comfort him? He had tons of people in his life to do that. She had no real connection with him, and in the future she’d have even less. They might see each other once in a while, but his interest was in the children, not in her — not really.

  “He was happy, truly happy. You can take comfort in that.”

  “It’s a little bittersweet. I’m glad he found happiness, but disheartened that he had to get away from us to do it.”

  “I wouldn’t think about it that way, Liam. We all leave the nest at some point.”

  This topic of conversation was obviously too much for him — he took a long breath and then plastered a false smile on his lips before replying.

  “Enough of this sadness. I think I mentioned that I had you investigated,” he said. Was that a hint of shame in his tone? It wasn’t possible.

  “And did I come out poorly?” Should she have even asked?

  “You’ve had a rough life. Losing your parents a decade ago must have been difficult.”

  “Wow, you really do your research,” she said with a sigh. She should be more offended, but this was how the wealthy operated. It did her no good to fight it.

  “Yes, it was hard, but my sister was married to your brother at that time. Newlyweds, actually. They didn’t hesitate, though, to take me in with them. The day I moved in was, to use your word, a bittersweet day for my sister. We’d just lost our parents, and she’d found out she was pregnant with Brayden. I think that pregnancy was the only thing that kept my head above water. Just that prospect of new life in our family. I missed my parents so much, but because of your brother and my sister, I at least wasn’t alone. I’m hoping I can give Brayden and Ally the same feeling, but a lot of the time I feel like I’m failing so badly. My sister was perfect. Yes, she married very young, but she was perfect.”

  “I think you’ve done the best job you could possibly do in your circumstances,” he told her.

  She was so lost in memories of her sister, she continued speaking of the past, not picking up the subtle distinction of his words. The sentence would certainly come back to haunt her later that night.

  “I lived with them until I went off to college. It’s probably the reason we were so close, and the reason I loved Vince so much. He was so good to my sister, and then me, and of course, to the children. We were a small family, but a very happy one.”

  “Your strength of character is one of the things I find so attractive about you, Whitney.”

  “Again, you barely know me. You can’t determine from a piece of paper whether I have a backbone,” she said with a laugh.

  “I can determine it by what you’ve accomplished.”

  She turned to look at his profile as she shook her head.

  “Yes, I’ve accomplished so much,” she said with sarcasm. “I finished my bachelor’s in mathematics, but didn’t get to complete my master’s or the education courses that would allow me to teach high school classes. I’ve been working in crappy customer service jobs since I was sixteen. I rented a small studio apartment until my sister’s house was willed to me, and I can fit all of my possessions into one room. On top of that, I don’t know how to heal the children’s pain. There are days when failure is the only thing I know.”

  Stupid, stupid, stupid! Why was she telling him all of this? Did she want to give him more reasons to take the children from her? Of course not. But sometimes it was so damned difficult to hold it all in, to stand strong.

  Liam stopped and turned her toward him. He rubbed his hands up and down on the outside of her jacket as he looked into her eyes.

  “We’re allowed to pity ourselves once in a while,” he told her. “As long as you don’t let it consume you. Focus on your strengths, and you’ll find that you’ve done a lot more than you realized.”

  “I don’t understand you, Liam. I really don’t. What does any of this matter to you, any
way?”

  “I like you. I told you that,” he said as if it were the simplest thing in the world. “And I want to know that you’ll be okay.”

  “Well, I’m not interested in getting into a relationship with you. It’s far too complicated, and I won’t be around long anyway.”

  “Then we should definitely make the most of the time we do have together.”

  This is when his earlier words hit her.

  “What did you mean by saying that I’ve done the best job I could?”

  “We’ve had a pleasant evening,” he told her. “I really wouldn’t want to ruin it.”

  She narrowed her eyes and pulled back from him. “Maybe you’re right. Maybe I don’t want to know what you mean.”

  Whitney tugged herself away from his grasp and whirled around, back in the direction they’d come from. She was surprised when he didn’t follow her when she walked away from him, but she was also relieved. She could completely see herself being worn down by his determination.

  That was the last thing she needed in her life right now.

  Her fears continued to grow the longer she remained in this man’s world. He was telling her she’d done the best she could do, but she also knew that what he wasn’t quite saying — that he could do so much better.

  Was this seduction nothing more than a way to distract her? If it was, it was working, because she was focused so much on this man that she was losing sight of the bigger picture — the picture of where her niece and nephew would spend the rest of their childhood.

  The biggest problem of all, however, was that she knew he was right. She knew there were so many more opportunities for the kids on this side of the country. Maybe the easiest solution of all would be for her to just move close by. Then they could all share the children and Liam could quit pretending he wanted her.

  She had a lot to think about. That was the only thing she knew for sure right now.

  Chapter Thirteen

  I forgot to tell you about the fundraiser that will be held here at the end of the week,” Frederick announced at the midday meal. “Of course it’s formal, with all that implies, and there will be music and entertainment.”

  “What’s a fundraiser?” Ally asked.

  “It’s something that raises money for those who aren’t as fortunate as you are, darling,” Whitney told her niece. “Or for good causes of other sorts.”

  “Yes, and sometimes for politicians, but that’s another matter entirely,” Frederick joked. “And if you go to the right fundraisers, they’re also a lot of fun,” Frederick told her. “You get to dance and dress up in a very pretty gown.”

  “Ooh, that sounds like fun! Are you going to dress up too, Auntie?”

  Whitney was at a loss for words. She had nothing to wear to such a fancy event, and even if she had, she wouldn’t know what to do there. The biggest fundraiser she’d been to so far in her life was a school carnival where she accepted tickets at a game for children.

  The school had raised about $20,000 that night, and it had seemed amazing at the time. But she somehow doubted that the event Frederick was speaking of would net less than seven figures. And she’d most likely trip on her own two feet as she entered the room. No. It was lucky that someone as lowly as she was on the social totem pole would never be invited.

  “Of course your aunt will go.” Liam had interrupted, and what he’d said made Ally smile broadly.

  Whitney wasn’t smiling; in fact, she sent him a menacing look. If she and Liam found themselves alone again, she’d certainly give him a piece of her mind. He needed to learn he couldn’t speak for her. The whole situation was absurd. Quite absurd. She’d tell him that in her best imitation of a cultured accent.

  “Dancing and fancy clothes don’t sound all that fun,” Brayden said with a sneer, though Whitney could see that he was intrigued. Appearing too interested in anything wasn’t what cool boys did.

  “You will have a wonderful time, Brayden, if you allow yourself to,” Frederick told him. Brayden looked at him skeptically, but his grandfather went on. “Just give it a try. If you hate it, you can ‘sneak’ away early.”

  That seemed to do the trick. Brayden’s frown disappeared.

  “You both should get back to your school lessons for the day, though. Since the fundraiser is coming up, we’ve added dance to your lessons,” Liam told them.

  Brayden groaned, and Ally squealed with delight.

  “I don’t need any extra lessons. I think we do more schoolwork here than we do at our actual school,” Brayden said with a pitiful sigh.

  “That’s an evident exaggeration,” Liam told him with a semblance of a smile. “Besides, don’t you think it’s always wise to introduce yourself to new pursuits, ones that your father and I engaged in when we were your age?”

  “Pursuits? What do you mean by that?” Brayden asked, suspicion clear in his tone.

  “Do I get to do them too?” Ally asked, not caring what the word pursuit meant — just making sure she was doing anything that her brother was doing.

  “Of course you do, Ally. And, Brayden, you’ll enjoy the new activities,” Liam said. And then his lips twitched.

  “The look on your face doesn’t exactly give me confidence, Uncle Liam.” Brayden turned toward Whitney with a look of panic.

  She wanted to rescue him, but she had to be practical. She couldn’t interfere in the small stuff, because then she would only seem petty. Besides, she happened to agree that dance was a good thing to learn. Brayden would appreciate it later in life, when the girls all wanted to dance with him. Granted, he wouldn’t want that for a few years, maybe four or five, but it would happen all too soon.

  “Brayden, you’ll go to your piano lesson before dance, so you get some time to brood about it,” Frederick said with obvious amusement. “Ally, you’re up for dance right after lunch.”

  “We still get to do the sword fighting, right?” Brayden asked.

  “Yes, you will still study fencing,” Liam replied.

  “I’m finished eating now,” Ally said, excited to start the new lessons. The young girl was always up for trying new things.

  She was so much like her mother, Whitney thought, and the longing in her heart to see her Maxine again made it hurt terribly.

  “But we’re only here about another week or two, Liam,” Whitney reminded him. “Should you really start new lessons of that sort when they’ll not get to follow through on them?”

  The room went quiet as all heads turned her way.

  “Things change, Whitney. Maybe you’ll decide to extend your vacation,” he told her.

  “We can’t do that. We told the school they’d be back after their Christmas break. They already missed two weeks of classes for this trip.”

  “And they are getting their lessons while here. Plus,” he added, “there are excellent schools here.” He sent her a look she couldn’t quite interpret, but most certainly frightened her. Her main fear was coming to life — the fear that the children would be taken away from her.

  Instead of facing that problem head on right now, she decided to agree with Frederick and Liam.

  “I don’t see a problem with having the children do more lessons. They might discover a new hobby that they can pursue when we get back home.” But she did shoot a warning look Liam’s way when she said this.

  “Good. Now that it’s that settled, we have a very busy day ahead of us. Let’s get started.” Liam rose from the table and walked out of the room.

  “Let me show you to the ballroom,” Darcy said, and Whitney gave her maid a grateful smile. She would enjoy watching her beautiful little girl swirl around on the dance floor.

  She hadn’t seen the ballroom before, and when they went in, she couldn’t help but feel the delight that flowed through her. The room was large enough to hold at least a thousand people in it — okay, maybe that was a gross exaggeration — and the chandeliers hanging from the ceiling were so sparkly that she wondered if diamonds were mixed in with the cry
stals. It was a room she would love to dance around, but instead she sat in a chair off to one corner. She was trying her best to be a quiet observer, but as Ally went on in the lesson, her aunt had to struggle not to clap with pride at how quickly her talented niece picked up on what the dancing master was teaching her.

  Whitney wanted to learn the dance herself, so she finally rose and began imitating the steps she saw. Though she lacked a partner, she felt that she wasn’t doing too badly.

  “May I cut in?” Liam asked.

  She blushed instantly. She’d been caught, darn it all.

  “I don’t want to take you away from whatever you were doing before,” Whitney told him. Touching him again would most certainly prove harmful to her health.

  “There’s nothing I would rather do right now than dance with you.”

  And she found herself accepting the hand he was holding out. “I guess I could use some help.”

  “I consider dancing an important art. It teaches many valuable lessons for journeys you will take throughout your life.”

  She knew there was a double meaning there, but she didn’t know how to address it, so she tried to make a joke instead. “I’m going to warn you that I’ve never danced in such a formal fashion before, and I can’t be responsible for your toes.”

  “I appreciate the warning, Whitney, but I have the feeling you’ll do just fine. Now put this hand on my shoulder and use your other one to take my hand like this.”

  The usual tremors racked her body. She tried to ignore them — unsuccessfully.

  “I’m really not a musical kind of person.”

  “Upbringing plays a big part in that, I believe. I took lessons in playing several instruments. My favorite was probably the violin.”

  “You play the violin?” she asked, and her resistance to him faded a bit more as he swept her across the floor, his eyes focused on her, his body making light contact with hers.

  “I’m hardly an expert, but … yes,” he said with a slight growl as he pulled her tightly against him for just a moment before pushing back and turning her in a slow spin. “Now focus a little more so my toes will survive.”