Who I Am With You Page 5

  “We finally have sun. What sounds like fun today?” Travis asked without his usual flirtatiousness—for now.

  “Getting out of here,” she said, thinking that’s exactly what she needed.

  “You know you’re free to leave anytime,” he told her. The same comment he’d made to her each time she whined about how boring the cabin was.

  “Wouldn’t you just love that?”

  “Actually, no,” he replied, seemingly in all seriousness. “I find that even when you’re in a grumpy mood, I enjoy being around you.”

  “Travis . . .” She gave a long-suffering sigh.

  “What? Do you want me to lie? I love being with you. I think the two of us began something several years ago that needs to be finished. Just because it wasn’t right back then, doesn’t mean it isn’t right now. You need to get that through your thick skull. And that scares the hell out of you, doesn’t it?”

  “No!” She wouldn’t admit how very scared that did make her. “I just think it’s pointless for us to pursue anything together. We missed our chance.”

  “There are no missed chances, Taylor. Only people too damn stubborn to see what’s right in front of them.”

  “There are many missed chances in life, Travis. You see, this is just one more area where the two of us differ. I am a ‘glass is half empty’ kind of girl. You’re the guy who believes the glass is always half full. We just don’t fit.”

  “If we combine the contents of the two glasses, Taylor, we have a full cup.”

  “Ugh. See what I mean, Travis. You’re always making comments like that, but do you really believe them?”

  “Yes. I actually do.”

  She stared at him for several moments before blowing out another frustrated sigh. “Our entire relationship has been built on a bed of sand, Travis. There’s nothing solid about it.” He’d surely drop the conversation now, wouldn’t he? No, no such luck.

  “Really? You’re forgetting an important fact.”

  When he said nothing else, just stared at her, she grew even more annoyed. “What?”

  “Just so you know, sand makes up about ninety-five percent of concrete. Add water and a bit of love and you have something that can never be washed away.”

  Several heartbeats passed before the knot in her throat eased and she could speak again. “Why do you have to say stuff like that? You know that what you just said is full of crap. Sand never makes up more than a third of the dry volume in concrete, and having less sand makes the concrete stronger. Hell, if you had concrete with ninety-five percent sand, it would just crumble. And even the strongest concrete degrades in time like anything else, especially under the powerful force of water. Are you just a hustler? Is this all just a game to you?” Taylor was breathless after that long rant.

  He laughed ruefully. “I guess I was trying too hard. But no, Taylor, it’s not a game at all. This is important to me. You’re more than just another woman. Your family is my family, and I don’t let go of family.”

  “If I mean so much to you, then why did you walk away from me?”

  Why couldn’t she let this topic go? What would it help to know why he hadn’t wanted her six years earlier? They had no chance at making a life together, so how would dwelling on what might have been help?

  He cast his eyes downward. “It wasn’t easy to walk away, but I felt guilty, and like I was betraying my best friend. Our timing just wasn’t right.”

  “And it’s not right now. Maybe I was ready then, but I’m no longer available.” How that rejection had hurt!

  “I think you’re more than ready, and when you feel brave enough to tell me, we’ll make magic together.”

  “What does that even mean, Travis? Is it let’s-string-together-bad-pickup-lines-and-old-clichés day in Montana?”

  Before he was able to reply, they heard a vehicle pull up outside. Taylor tensed, wondering who in the world it could be. No one, no matter how lost, would end up way out in the middle of nowhere.

  “Wait here,” Travis said, standing up and moving toward the front door, grabbing the sidearm he always kept handy. A shiver passed through Taylor as she eyed the deadly weapon.

  She was grateful he had it, especially out in the woods, but she’d never been interested in guns. Sure, her brothers hunted, but she’d never been into killing animals for sport. When Travis peeked out the window and then his shoulders relaxed, Taylor released the breath she hadn’t even realized she’d been holding.

  “It’s your parents,” he said before laughing. “And your brothers, and they don’t look too pleased. I’m thinking they finally figured out the two of us are here together.”

  Before he could say anything further, the door flew open. Hawk strode in, looking as if he expected to find the two of them in a steamy embrace.

  “Travis,” Hawk said in greeting, but it seemed to be more of a warning than a hello.

  As much as her overbearing family drove her nuts sometimes, she loved them dearly, and loved how protective they were of her. If only she could choose what they were protective about, and what they left her alone to live her life for . . .

  “Hawk!” she said as she stood up and rushed toward him. It had only been a week since she’d seen him, but time seemed to stand still in this little cabin in the woods.

  “Taylor.” He met her halfway and pulled her against him for a hug before drawing back and assessing her. “How are you feeling? Have you had any problems? Are you ready to come back home?” He was firing the questions off too fast for her to answer, so she waited for him to finish.

  “I’m feeling fine, Hawk, and no, I haven’t had problems, and I assure you that you will know immediately when I’m ready to come back to town.” She emphasized the last word, because when she did come back from the woods, she doubted she’d be going back to her parents’ home. She was more than ready to have her own place again if she was to be stuck in Montana for any length of time.

  “Baby girl, I’ve been trying to give you your space, but your father and I figured you’d be running low on supplies, so we wanted to surprise you,” Maggie said as she hugged Taylor next before passing her to her father.

  “You were thinking right. I just ate the last chocolate bar last night,” Taylor said. That was a true emergency, after all.

  “I was thinking more real food, but I did include chocolate,” Maggie said with a laugh.

  “So what in the hell are you doing shacking up with my baby sister?”

  The room went silent and everyone froze as Taylor turned to find her brother—Travis’s best friend—facing off with him.

  “I’m not shacking up with your sister, Bryson—though I suppose you could say I’m cabining up with her, if not in the way you mean. And it’s great to see you, too,” Travis said, not even slightly ruffled.

  “I thought you wanted peace and quiet,” Bryson growled.

  “I did want that, and you promised it to me, but apparently your mother thought it would be a good idea for Taylor to get some peace and quiet as well.”

  “And what have the two of you been doing?” Bryson asked, hands on his hips. “The cabin only has one room.”

  Taylor saw that her brother was also carrying a gun. This could end badly.

  “Are you accusing me of something, Bryson?” Travis asked in an almost deadly calm that sent a shiver down Taylor’s spine. It was time to step in.

  “This is none of your damn business, Bryson,” she said, and Bryson turned her way. “If you have a problem or want to make accusations, then maybe you should fire your questions at me.”

  “I don’t need you to step in for me,” Travis said, still obviously unhappy with Bryson’s attitude.

  “We’ll talk later,” Taylor said, sending him a look that had shut up more than one man during her years on the circuit.

  “Yeah, we will.” Another shiver passed down her spine. This one wasn’t fear, though.

  Turning away from Travis before the two of them combusted, she faced Bryson agai
n. Finally, his hands dropped and he walked up to her. “I’m sorry, sis. I’m just worried about you,” he said and gave her a hug.

  “It’s okay to worry about me, but you don’t have to come in here acting like an ass in the process.” But she easily accepted his apologetic hug and gave him a big squeeze in return. “And though it’s none of your business, we’ve been taking turns with the room. I was quite unhappy to find Travis here at first, and I wanted him to leave, but he’s been . . . helpful, and not bad company.”

  “What? You’re making her sleep on the couch?” Bryson said as he turned toward Travis.

  Before Travis could reply, she spoke. “That also is none of your business.”

  She stared sternly at her brother for several long seconds while he seemed to be gathering his wits. Finally, he gave her a sheepish grin before pulling her close to his side.

  “Okay. I’ll leave you alone, but just know that I can be here in less than an hour if Travis gets out of line,” he told her, turning his head and sending Travis a look only guys could read.

  “Deal,” she said, sending her own little smirk Travis’s way.

  And just like that, the tension was defused. They all made a couple of trips out to her parents’ gigantic SUV and brought in all the new supplies her mother had bought.

  “Are you thinking I’ll be out here for the next decade, Mom?” Taylor asked with a laugh as she looked at the bags now covering the counter and kitchen floor.

  “I wasn’t sure what you’d need,” Maggie said. Her mother had always been a nurturer to anyone who needed help.

  “I really appreciate it,” Taylor said. “I’ll appreciate it a lot more if you help me put it away.” Otherwise it would take all night to get the supplies organized.

  The family spent a pleasant afternoon visiting, and when the sun began to set, Travis lit a small fire in the outdoor pit. Taylor curled her legs beneath her and roasted a marshmallow to perfection before slapping it onto a graham cracker with chocolate. An absolutely perfect s’more.

  “So flipping good,” she said with a sigh, making her brothers laugh.

  Travis, Hawk, and Bryson were on the other side of the fire, enjoying the fragrant cigars Hawk had brought along, and her parents were sitting together on a large log with notches for seats.

  Soon the conversation quieted, and Taylor found her eyes drifting closed. She was sound asleep when her parents and brothers packed themselves into the SUV and promised Travis they’d return soon.

  She woke up only partially, just enough to think it all a dream, when Travis lifted her into his arms, carried her inside, and laid her on the bed. After removing her shoes and sweatshirt, he covered her up and headed for the door.

  Her last sigh was his name on her lips.

  Travis jerked straight up on the ridiculously uncomfortable couch, instantly awake and alert as he tried to focus his eyes in the dark room.

  Only shadows danced on the walls from the dying embers in the fireplace, but it was enough light for him to get his bearings and see that no silhouettes, either human or animal, were moving around the cabin. What had woken him?

  A groan of pain coming from the bedroom answered his unspoken question. Instantly on his feet, grabbing the gun he kept beneath the couch, he moved swiftly to Taylor’s room and pushed open the door, the bathroom light casting a soft glow over her grimacing face as she held her knee to her chest and twisted around on the bed.

  “Taylor, what is it?” he asked, instantly putting the gun down on the nightstand and carefully sitting on the edge of the bed as he reached out a hand for her.

  “It’s nothing,” she said shakily.

  “I can’t help you if I don’t know what the problem is.”

  “My leg,” she groaned. Her body tensed and sweat broke out on her head.

  “What happened?” He reached for the leg she was holding, and tried to see whether there was an open wound. He couldn’t find anything, but the light was dim.

  “It’s an old injury,” she replied, tears now falling down her face as she writhed in pain before him.

  “What can I do?”

  “Nothing. I get these muscle spasms in my thigh, and when they hit, they’re pure hell, but I just have to suffer through it.” She twisted again, moaning, and this time, her body fell against his. She was in too much pain to scoot away.

  “What if I massage it?”

  The thought of doing exactly that was making him break out in a sweat, but he could hardly just leave her like this. Touching her leg would ensure that he wouldn’t get back to sleep tonight, but he’d endure anything to ease her pain.

  “The doctor said that would help, but I can’t do it . . .”

  He unclasped her clenched fingers from her knee and ran his hands along her thighs until he felt a huge knot.

  “Damn, Taylor! This feels terrible,” he gasped.

  “I’ve dealt with it for the past two years. I’ll deal with it tonight.”

  But she didn’t even have the energy to swat away his hands. So, taking great care not to hurt her if at all possible, he began kneading the flesh of her naked thigh.

  What in the hell was she wearing? It seemed to be about the tiniest pair of panties the stores could possibly sell. Dammit. That was the last thing he should be focusing on, and he refused to think about the light skin of her stomach peeking at him above those panties, where her T-shirt had ridden up.

  After a few moments, he increased the pressure of his fingers and massaged her inner thigh. Another moan escaped her lips, but this one was a mixture of pain and relief. He was pretty sure he was helping her, because she wasn’t twisting as violently.

  He moved his hands downward, and she protested. “No. Please. Where you were!”

  Going back to the place he’d been kneading, a place far too close to her barely concealed core, he continued massaging, finally feeling the hard knot begin to relax under his sure fingers.

  Travis didn’t know how long he ministered to her, but pretty soon she was lying there still, her cries and moans silenced and the muscle in her thigh back to normal. He continued rubbing, unsure whether it would tense again if he stopped.

  She was no longer sweating, but he could feel the temperature in the room rising the longer he sat on the bed, the longer he touched her smooth skin. This was more torture than he could ever remember feeling.

  “Thank you, Travis. I . . . It usually lasts a long time,” Taylor whispered, and he figured that was his cue to stop.

  But for some reason, his fingers wouldn’t lift from her skin. Moving them downward, he rubbed along her lower thigh, then down her calf, and he finally captured a foot, pushing his thumbs against her tender arch, eliciting another moan of pleasure from her beautiful mouth.

  “I don’t hurt there,” she said, but there was no protest in her voice.

  Travis said nothing as he moved to the other foot and took a few minutes to rub along the arch before working his way up her calf and finally reaching her other thigh, making her breath hitch and her body begin to move again on the bed—though this time there was no pain involved. No pain for her, at least.

  His hands now gave their attention to the curve of her waist and then the sides of her breasts as he leaned over her. He was so unbelievably hot right then that he didn’t know whether he had enough control to stop touching her.

  “Open your eyes, Taylor.”

  Slowly, sweetly, achingly, her eyes opened, and the desire he saw reflected in their deep blue depths had him catching his breath.

  “I’m going to kiss you now.” That was all the warning he gave before he bent forward and took her lips, his tongue tracing the edges before sliding inside and possessing her the way he’d been longing to from the moment he’d seen her drive away on that dark Montana road.

  Careful not to push against her still-sore body, he lay next to her and pressed her against him with one hand so he could feel her perfect curves. Deepening the kiss, he swallowed the moan she released into his m
outh before his other hand moved up along her side and slid around to cup one breast.

  The feel of her pebbled nipple against his palm had his arousal pulsing. He pressed his hips against hers, the need to take her so consuming that he could think of absolutely nothing else. And why not? Would it really be so bad to satisfy them both?

  When her hands came up and sifted through his hair, he nearly lost the battle raging within him. He knew he had to back off, to do the honorable thing. She’d been in pain, and he’d come in to help her. It wasn’t an excuse to satisfy himself, even if she needed it just as much as he did.

  “Tell me you want to make love, Taylor.” If she told him she wanted him, then all bets were off. He’d have permission. He wouldn’t just be taking from her. Leaning back only slightly, he cupped her breast, his fingers gliding across her nipple, making her body shudder.

  He nibbled on her bottom lip as he waited to hear the words he desperately wanted. And he got . . . nothing. No words at all. He leaned back, his body screaming at him to continue what he’d been doing.

  Her eyes were closed, her breathing heavy, her hips still pressed tightly against his. There was no doubt that she could feel exactly what she was doing to him. The question was whether she cared to do anything about it.

  “Taylor.” He waited for her eyes to open, and it seemed to take forever, but finally, those beautiful eyes focused on his, and after a few more heartbeats, they began to clear, and now it was Travis who was in pain, because he knew the answer before she spoke.

  “This isn’t a good idea, Travis.”

  “Why?” he demanded. If she wanted to stop, then he at least deserved to know why.

  “I’m not ready for this,” she said, her voice almost broken.

  At the distress in her eyes, Travis lost all the fight that he’d been about to give. He ran his hand along the side of her face, cupping her beautiful skin as he looked into her eyes.

  “Then I’ll wait until you are.”

  Her eyes widened, but he decided it was a good time to leave—now, before he couldn’t. Leaning down, he caressed her lips with his before letting her go, and he slipped from the room, closing the door behind him.